Hiding Under Blankets

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Hiding under blankets used to be my favorite pass time when I was depressed or feeling anxious. I could get my whole body under them, toes and all. Not a tiny bit of me would be exposed. The only thing bothersome about it was that since I was completely covered up, the air would get slightly stale. I had a solution for that. I would just slip my c-pap on and I could stay under the covers for hours and hours.

For the first few months that I was seeing my counselor, she was fully aware that I was still using my hiding technique as a way to cope. When she finally let me know that she thought that I could manage my depression and anxiety without hiding under blankets I was scared. I honestly did not think I had progressed enough to manage my anxiety and depression without my hiding technique. Then she just had to go and make things worse. She told me that I would have to get up in the mornings, take my shower, and get dressed so I would not be as tempted to go back to bed and hide under blankets. In my head I knew I would end up a quivering ball on the floor, crying for my blankets.

The reality of what happened was completely different. For the first few weeks, when I would feel anxious or I was having a bad mental health day, I would really , I mean really, really want to hide under blankets. I would resist the urge though. After a few weeks of resisting the call of hiding, I began to realize that hiding under blankets was not my first choice when I was experiencing anxiety or feeling extra depressed anymore. I had replaced that hiding habit with other things to do as a way to keep myself occupied until I could work through whatever it was that was causing me extra depression or anxiety.

I still get anxious and I still have depression. Those things are still there. However, I have coping skills that I did not have before. I may have lost my blankets, but I have also lost that powerless, paralyzed feeling that I used to get when the anxiety would strike. In my book that is a good trade off.

Have you ever been overwhelmed with anxiety?

If so how did/do you manage it?

If you manage your anxiety well, what tips do you have for those of us who do not?

My inspiration for writing this post came from Jodeen-Kitterman-Leck at A Road Newly Traveled

I am looking forward to your answers, Neighbors!

Thursday Thunks – I Would SMUSH it

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This week we will answer some crazy questions brought to you by Kimber, the color of cooked crab, and the number 544.


1. It’s the first of April, do you play April Fool’s jokes on anyone?

Here’s the deal…..I cannot answer that question because the person I plan on torturing tomorrow sometimes reads my blog.

2. Do you like to eat sardines?

Yes, I like canned sardines and I really enjoy fresh sardines.

3. Have you ever played racketball?

No, it scares me. I have this thing about balls flying very fast toward my face.

4. If eating at a fast food joint that has a dollar menu, do you order a bunch of different dollar items or just go ahead and get a regular meal?

regular menu

5. Have you ever taken a brand new pencil and sharpened it in an electric sharper until it was almost gone just because you were bored?

No, I would never do that. However, I have encouraged my children to, so that we could see what would happen

8. If marijuana is legalized, do you think it should have a luxury tax added onto it?

yeah, if cigarettes and alcohol do, then it should as well.

9. What’s the oddest thing you have sitting on your computer desk right now or where ever it is you may be sitting with a laptop (you could be sitting at a Starbucks with an alien from Mars for all we know

my leopard print snuggie, I am on the couch.

10. Have you ever bumped into a former lover and found out they were now gay or straight depending on your relationship with them?

Nope!

11. Have you ever held owned a tarantula?

My son did. It was big and hairy.

One time right before I was to have foot surgery, his tarantula escaped. So I had a horrible vision, that I was laying on the couch with my foot elevated on pillows. I wake up from a nap and that hairy monster would be sitting on my chest. After the vision, I informed him that he better find it because if I did, I would SMUSH it!

12. Shower- curtain, door, walk-in, or do you just roll around in the dirt to get the stink off?

door

13. Which commercial is the most annoying to you on TV or radio?

Those stupid viagra commercials where the guys are playing their guitars destroying an old song by turning it into a viagra jingle.

Thursday Thirteen – History

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I thought since I had so much fun with my Unique McDonald’s last week, that this week I would list thirteen historical facts about McDonald’s.

1. 1940 – Dick and Mac McDonald open McDonald’s Bar-B-Que restaurant in San Bernardino, California.

2. 1948 – McDonald’s is founded. Dick and Mac McDonald shut down their restaurant for three months for alterations. It opens back up in December as a self service drive in restaurant. The menu was reduced to only nine items hamburgers, cheeseburgers, soft drinks, milk, coffee, potato chips and an apple pie. A hamburger only cost 15 cents.

3. 1949 – French fries replace the potato chips. Triple thick milkshakes make their debut.

4. 1958 – McDonald’s sells their 100 millionth hamburger.

5. 1961 – Hamburger University opens in the basement of the Elk Grove Village, Illinois McDonald’s restaurant. Graduates receive Bachelor of Hamburgerology degrees.

6 1962 – McDonald’s in Denver, Colorado became the first McDonald’s with indoor seating.

7. 1966 – Ronald McDonald appeared in his first TV commercial on his “fly hamburger”

8. 1968 – The Big Mac is introduced

9. 1971 – The Hamburglar, Grimace, Mayor McCheese, Captain Crook, and the Big Mac join Ronald McDonald, in McDonaldland.

10. 1973 – The Quarter Pounder debuts

11. 1975 – the Egg McMuffin is added to the menu

12. 1979 – Happy Meals make their entrance.

13. 1988 – Fortune Magazine names McDonald’s hamburgers among the 100 things that America makes best best

Faith

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In the past I have struggled with having faith. It was very difficult for me to just “close my eyes and leap”. I wanted proof that something was what it was proclaimed to be. That is probably why I have spent a great deal of my life trying to find what worked for me and my spiritual life. I never could commit to anything. I felt they all lacked the proof I needed to have faith in them.

On another blog, I read a post by Ameila’s Mummy who has a similar religious background as mine. Right now she and her husband are going through some sort of difficulty and while she is on the verge of panic attacks, her husband is dealing with whatever is going on just fine. The difference is that he is going to church and praying every day and has left the burden of what they are going through in God’s hands, and she just does not have the same faith in a God she cannot see, feel or touch.

She is not alone in how she feels. I have felt that way before, as well as many other people. Taking a leap of faith into the unknown is a very hard thing to do. I suppose that is why it is called faith. The very definition of faith is believing in something that cannot be seen.

I personally believe that kind of proof that people like me want so that we can have faith in God is impossible to obtain. Part of being a Christian is believing that Jesus is our Savior. He took our sins upon himself, and SAVED us. So at some point we just have to trust that God is going to be there to catch as we take a leap of faith.

I know that sounds like an easy answer for a difficult problem. The truth is though, it is just that easy, if you will do it. Try it! You have nothing to lose, and everything to gain.

Do You Care?

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Everyday I wake up thankful. What a wonderful feeling that is. I am thankful for many things, what I am most thankful for is the people in my life who care. Not just caring for me, but in general they care for others. They do not have to care about other people, they just do.

It is easy to see the evidence of the physical things that people do out of caring for others. What we cannot see as easily is how these acts of caring affect people spiritually. Even doing something as small as bringing someone a cup of water can affect them spiritually.

I think this quote by Mother Teresa points out how physical needs are tied to spiritual needs.

“Hungry not only for bread – but hungry for love. Naked not only for clothing – but naked for human dignity and respect. Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks – but homeless because of rejection.” ~Mother Teresa

I believe that most people feel that they do not have anything beneficial to offer another person. What they do not realize is that the simplest act of caring can bring hope to the hopeless, strength to the weary, and a feeling of joy to those who are sad. I even believe it can save someone’s life.

Do you care?

Have you ever done something for a stranger because you cared?

Have you ever wanted to perform an act of caring for someone but did not because you did not think it would make a difference?

If an opportunity presented itself for you to perform an act of caring would you do so now?

I challenge you to perform an act of caring, Neighbors.

April Comment Challenge!

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Harriet of Harriet and Friends is up to her old tricks again. She is hosting another comment challenge for us to participate in.

This time she is allowing each participant to set their own goal for how many comments they would like to leave during the month of April. For example I am going with 1000, someone else could go with a goal of 200.

For more information about how the contest works and the rules please visit Harriet at Harriet and Friends

I really hope to see you there.

The Queen's Tuesday Meme – You should not slobber

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The What Not Meme

People are always giving advice on what NOT to do in this situation and that situation. I’ve had it with the know-it-alls this week. I’m switching it up.
It’s your turn to be the expert. Answer what NOT to do in the following situations.
It’s your spin on potential societal blunders (and a few quirky scenarios you might find yourself in). You didn’t think I’d leave my quirk home now did ya?
Have at it.


What NOT To Do when you’re…..

1. On a first date You should not fall asleep. (which my husband did during the movie we were seeing)

2. Intoxicated You should not go on a first date.

3. In the shower You should not pee.

4. At your ex’s wedding You should not go to it in the first place.

5. In jail You should not smart off to the strongest inmate.

6. being stalked having been stalked….You should not go anywhere alone.

7. Stuck to an igloo You should not touch the igloo with your tongue.

8. In sewing class You should not threaten to sew someone’s lips shut.

9. Asleep in a helium balloon You should not have a needle in your pocket.

10. At a birthday party for twins You should not get them each the same gift.

11. On a nude beach You should not stare at someone’s ummmm….private parts.

12. At the opera You should not sing along loudly.

13. you’re falling in love You should not run away.

14. Low on gasoline in a bad part of town You should not stop and get gas.

15. Having a baby You should not yell obscenities at the doctor because you think he is taking too long to wash his hands and you have to push (something I did).

16. On fire You should not run around yelling “I am on fire”!

17. Lost at the mall I get lost a lot….You should not move from the spot you are in.

18. At a single’s dance You should not come with a date.

19. Riding a bike on the Jersey Turnpike You should not even being doing this in the first place.

20. Driving your significant other’s car You should not go out with the person you are having an affair with in your significant other’s car.

21. Being robbed at gunpoint You should not attempt to joke with the robber

22. Kissing You should not slobber on the person you are kissing.

23. Paying the hotel cashier You should not attempt to pay with foreign money.

24. Buying lingerie You should not take your children.

24. Commenting on a blog You should not spam.

25. In Queen Mimi’s dungeon You should not toilet paper the dungeon, it makes the Queen very unhappy.

The Simple Woman's Daybook – March 30th, 2010

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FOR TODAY March 30th, 2010

Outside my window…”Walking on Sunshine”

I am thinking…about the writing contest I submitted a writing piece for.

I am thankful for…for so many many things! I cannot even name them all.

From the kitchen…nothing. I need to fix lunch though

I am wearing…pajamas

I am creating…in my brain, a blog post

I am going…no where as usual.

I am reading…information about writing

I am hoping…I do well in the writing contest

I am hearing…the coffee maker

Around the house…the dog is sleeping on me, the temperature inside is just right, and my daughter is doing her thing

One of my favorite things…was the pleasant conversation I had with my mother this morning

A few plans for the rest of the week:same old thing for me.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing…

Randomness

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I have been very serious lately. My funny bone must be on vacation. That is OK, serious is good too. I still have a positive attitude and I am not feeling depressed. Just serious. I think it is because I have been having serious thoughts. I have been thinking a lot about my son. Not in the depressed, I am falling apart sad way like it used to be. Just missing him. Wondering how he ended up with such a chip on his shoulder and the part I played in that happening. Not in a beating myself up kind of way. I have been thinking long and hard about something. I have been thinking of telling mine and his story. How much he meant to me before he was born, the things that we experienced together when we were just a little family of two, what it was like when we became a family of three then four, and how much he means to me now. This has been weighing on me for several weeks now. It would be a long story, so I would have to do it in installments. I wish I could say it would be a fairy tale story, but I made some big mistakes when he was growing up. So it will be a tough story to write and most likely a tough story for people to read. However, I think since it is something I have been thinking about for so many weeks, that it is a story I am meant to tell.

I was supposed to see my counselor this afternoon, but that did not happen. Her office called this morning and said she was sick and could not see me today. In the whole almost year I have been seeing her this is the first time she could not see me due to illness. I was disappointed but I understood. I already have my appointment rescheduled for next week.

I guess that is enough rambling for now, Neighbors.

http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm53/Chyra_1/Signature/58B23D7559E78E2051C9AC2338A6DB58.png

Monday Mayhem – Spray It All Over The Place

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Welcome to Monday Mayhem.

Today’s Meme is the Annoying meme
For each of the prompts, name what annoys you….
Have fun.


What annoys you about people that you spend time with outside your home (coworkers etc)?

Except for when I go to the counselor’s office, the only people I spend time away from home with is my family. The only time they annoy me is when my anxiety is bothering me and I want to make the shortest trip away from home as possible, and they want to take their time. Fortunately, that happens less and less.

What annoys you about people in your home?

Everything. Except for a very select few people, I cannot stand it when people are in my home.

What annoys you about talking on the phone?

Everything. It is annoying and it is distracting.

What annoys you about the over-used terms that people use?

Nothing Really. I am sure I employ lots of over-used terms in my speech and writing.

What annoys you about restaurant foods?

When the food is not as good as I thought it would be.

What annoys you about restaurant servers?

When they are cocky and arrogant, or when they flirt with my husband, or when they spend too much time talking at my table, or when they flirt with my husband.

What annoys you about reading other blogs?

Honestly? Nothing. Who am I to judge someone else’s blog?

What annoys you about memes?

Nothing, I enjoy them all.

What annoys you about commenting on blogs?

The captcha thing. Due to my vision problems, I often have a hard time reading those captcha words. It usually takes me three or four times of getting the captcha words wrong before I get them right.

What annoys you about people who chew gum?

When they do not dispose of it properly

What annoys you about driving on the highway?

aggressive drivers

What annoys you about shopping at Walmart?

Those people who are on the body spray and deoderant aisle, who think it is OK to spray the body sprays all over the place. Not only does it cause problems for people with breathing problems,in my opinion it is the same as shoplifting. They are wasting body sprays that someone may really want to buy and when they do buy it they are not getting a full bottle. To further annoy me, Walmart does not have a policy against this, or even against people using the fingernail polish in the makeup aisle.

What annoys you about kids?

loud, ill behaved children, who are running around like little maniacs.

What annoys you about your gender?

This is an odd question. My answer is nothing.

What annoys you about the opposite sex?

Men have this habit of not sharing their feelings, not all men, but the majority are wired that way. It can be very irritating for the women in their lives if they want to have a discussion about feelings.

What annoys you about shoes?

When I cannot find the really cool shoes in my size.

What annoys you about shopping for clothes?

Just trying to find clothes that I like. I am a bigger sized woman. Sometimes it seems to me that the places I can afford to shop believe that fat women do not want to have nice cloths.

What annoys you about music?

When it is too loud.

What annoys you about drinking alcohol?

I do not drink due to my health problems.

What annoys you about pizza?

When it has too much red sauce.