I was catching up with my blog reading and I ran across a post at A Journey.  It was about owning our wellness and creating a state of mind of  wellness rather than one of illness.  At the end of the post, the author asks:

How have you learned to OWN your own wellness and create that mind-shift from “illness” to one of living in “wellness”?

I like this question.  I like the line of thinking it represents.  I like how it implies that we can take a proactive role in our wellness.

I have learned to own my mental wellness.  I have learned to make that mind-shift from “illness” to one of living in “wellness”.  It has been a long and difficult process and there are some days when I am not as successful with this state of mind as I would like to be, but that is okay.  At least I am trying.

How did I accomplish this?  The answer will sound easy.  I simply replaced my negative illness thinking and actions with positive wellness thinking and actions.

My core being was one of negativity and illness. Everything I looked at, experienced, thought about, and even talked about came from that place that was negative and ill.  Everything in my life was tainted by this illness to some extent.  Eventually, when that illness consumed my entire being I shut down and no longer wanted to live.  Even after I tried to make myself die, I wanted no part of being well.  For me to get to a point of being able to want to take any part in being well required medication, a psychiatric hospitalization, and months of counseling.

At some point in all this treatment for my illness, I began to see the world and myself differently.  I began replacing my negative thoughts and reactions with more positive ones.  It was a slow process for sure.  On some days, replacing those thoughts and reactions was simply impossible.  I had been thinking this way for most of my life, there was no way I was going to instantly be able to change it. However, the more I attempted it, the easier it became.

I also had to learn to be proactive in my actions towards being well.  For me, that means taking my medications, seeing my counselor and psychiatrist, and sticking to my treatment plan.

I own my mental wellness.  I do what I can to take care of myself.  I understand that some days will be better wellness days than others.  As long as I am doing the best that I can to own my own mental wellness, then I am doing a wonderful job.

How have you learned to OWN your own wellness and create that mind-shift from “illness” to one of living in “wellness”

What does letting go really mean? Is it just releasing a material thing you are holding onto? Or is it putting aside an old habit? Can letting go be the release of emotions such as hate, resentment and fear? How about sharing our worries, concerns, and fears with someone, is that letting go?  The answer is Yes.   Letting go can mean all of those things and more.

I believe holding onto something, (a material thing, negative emotion, worry, and etc.) too tightly allows it to become a stumbling block.  Using material things as an example, what would happen if we held onto everything that came into our house? Our house would get  junked up and more than likely we would have real objects that we would be tripping over, or running into. In other words stumbling blocks. However, if we were to carefully go through that same house, letting go of items that we did not need or did not provide us with healthy pleasure, we would be able to remove a great deal of our tangible stumbling blocks. At the end of this process we will have created a lot of extra room in our home, making it possible to reorganize the items that are left, and possibly making room for newer and better stuff.

Holding on to emotions like anger, resentment, hate, worry, fear and shame is very much like holding onto all those material possessions.  They become stumbling blocks, only instead of actually tripping over them, they get in the way of our personal growth.  Over time, the more of those emotions we hold onto, the more they pile up and the more difficult the clean up process (letting go) becomes.

There was a time when I let those emotions pile up in me.  After a while, it was if my resentment, anger, fear, worry, and shame became a wall of clutter that blocked my ability to grow and change.  I became stuck in my emotional junk.  To get unstuck, I had to summon up what little courage I had and share my feelings.  The best way for me to let go, was to share the truth about why I was so angry, worried, afraid, and ashamed.  I shared things on my blog, with my counselor, with my psychiatrist and as I became more emotionally healthy I began to share things with my family. The more I repeat this process of letting go, the smaller those piles of emotional clutter become.

In my opinion letting go of emotional stumbling blocks is a process that would benefit almost everyone.  I also believe sharing that emotional clutter with others is an important part of that letting go process.  You do not have to let go of your emotional junk in a public fashion like I do, choosing a trusted friend and/or family to share your stumbling blocks with is just as effective.  Even choosing several people to share with works well.

No matter how you do it, just let go.  Let it all go.