I was reading a blog post  by William Cody Bateman, titled How To Take Criticism.  I really like what he had to say in his post and it inspired me to do a little thinking about criticism and our reactions to it.

Back in the dark days, when my internal dialogue was filled with nothing nice about myself, when someone approached me with constructive criticism, I did not react well.  What I usually did was take what was said out of concern, and warp it in such a way that it turned out to be very negative.  I would add it to my internal dialogue as another way to torture myself. I would also become very resentful of the person who had said anything to me.

One thing I have learned in the last fourteen months, is that for me, depression recovery is full of constructive criticism.  From my counselor, my husband, my mother, and so on.  When they take the time to share constructive criticism with me, it is done out of concern for me, knowing that I want to be as healthy as possible.

Now that my mind set is a more positive one, I find that I can handle that type of criticism much better than before.  I can usually take what has been shared with me, think about it, and decide if it is something I believe would be helpful to change about myself.  Most of the time, I can do all of that without using the criticism to beat myself up.  There are times though, maybe when I am hormonal, or having a not great mental health day that such constructive criticism hits me like a slap in the face.  When that happens I fall back into the old pattern of behavior and end up feeling very upset and angry.

Because of the occasional back slide into old behaviors, I believe that I still have a great deal of work to do on how I accept constructive criticism.  I need to remember that when my counselor or a loved one approaches me with a desire to help me, they are doing it out of concern for my well being.  They are not doing it to give me something to beat myself up about.

How well do you accept constructive criticism?  Do you use it as a tool to help yourself grow in a positive direction?  Do you use it as a tool to beat yourself up with?