Monthly Archives: March 2010

The Simple Woman's Daybook – March 23, 2010

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FOR TODAY March 23, 2010

Outside my window… cloudy

I am thinking…that it is officially spring in the South, so why are we still having snow flurries?

I am thankful for… my little dog Minnie

From the kitchen…I see a light

I am wearing…pajamas

I am creating… nothing really right now

I am going… no where! I accidentally slept through my counseling appointment, so we did a mini session on the phone

I am reading… blogs and directions for plugins

I am hoping… no one is cranky today

I am hearing… the dog snoring

Around the house… it is cold and I am covered in blankets

One of my favorite things… is this meme

A few plans for the rest of the week: nothing really, my daughter is spending the week with her grandparents so I am going to enjoy the quiet

Here is picture for thought I am sharing…

The Queens Meme – FaceTwit

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Welcome to the Queen’s Tuesday Meme #30

Sometimes silly.
Sometimes serious.
Always fun!
Step out of the box.
Be creative.
Use your imagination.
No one’s answers are quite like yours.

The Facebook Meme (aka The FaceTwit Meme)
It’s a little longer than usual but I just couldn’t stop in 140 words or less. Sorry.

1. Facebook has now surpassed Google in number of users and traffic.
How much time do you spend on Facebook? If not FB, do you use Twitter?

I have been known to spend all day on Facebook. But lately I have not spent as much time there. I use TweetDeck for Twitter, so I always see my tweets and can respond right away if I want to.

2. What is Farmville? I do not understand why people are asking me for margarine.

It is a farming game. hmmm no one has asked me for margarine, but they have been asking me for gold and building supplies. As soon as I finish this meme I am going to go harvest my bell peppers.

3. Do you war in the Mafia Wars? I do not understand why people are asking me for cows.

I do not play mafia wars

4. What is Cafe World? I do not understand why people are asking me for bullets!

Cafe world is a game about owning your own restaurant. Why are they asking for bullets? That is strange!

5. Are you being bombarded with these “See Who Has Been Looking At your Profile – See Who Your Peeps Are?” application request lately?
I don’t understand why people are asking me for my photograph and that of my dogs.

Yes, I have also heard rumors that it was a virus. I have no idea if that is true or not.

6. Which FB or Twitter applications, tags or gifts irritate you the most and why?

None really irritate me. If I get some request or whatever that I do not have an interest in,I just hit the ignore button.

7. Every morning I am faced with the question at the top of my Facebook profile page, “What’s On Your Mind?” Now Mr. Online Mailman wants to know the same thing. Does the whole world need to know what I’m thinking at every moment? I can’t write that in a public place ya know. But if you had to answer that question honestly at 9:00 am each morning, what would you say?

I would say I was thinking about coffee and going back to bed.

8. Do you know how you became friends and followers with everyone in your list on Facebook and Twitter?

Facebook yes, twitter no

9. Have you ever been deceived online by someone you thought was someone else? How did you know?

no

10. Do you enjoy chatting via Yahoo Messenger or AOL the old-fashioned way? If so, who do you chat with most online?

yes and my mother.

11. Have you ever been contacted on Facebook or via email under false pretenses, for dubious purposes, or by meddling nosy people in general?

No

12. Think about it. We are all flitting around making bird noises on the internet. What would the PETA people say?! Can you think of a more suitable animal mascot for Twitter? What kind of sound would we make?

Sheep BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

13. What kind of new cool innovative application would you like to see on Facebook or Twitter? What would you call it?

hmmmm I have no idea

14. Have you ever had to block someone from Facebook or Twitter?

both

15. Do you allow your real life friends to communicate with you there or do you prefer to be incognito to the universe at large?

they can communicate with them there

16. Do you belong to any CAUSES on Facebook or Twitter? If so, what makes you passionate about them and why did you join?

No

17. Do you know what a Twibe is?

no

18. Have you ever rage twitted? Tell me!

no

19. I find that more and more people are reading my blogs on Facebook and commenting there? Do you share your blog posts on Facebook? Do you find that it helps or hinders your blog traffic?

I think it helps my traffic

20. Wanna be my friend on FB? I have nearly 150 now. At least I’d recognize you!
Don’t you be foolin’ me now.
If you look under the “Follow Me” near the top of the page you will see a button to be my friend on Facebook, and also on Twitter.

Sunday Stealing –

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Today we ripped this meme off a blogger named Lily at the blog F*ck Art Let’s Dance. She does not say where she found the meme. But, it was probably stolen there as well. So, of course, that will be as far as we go. Tracing back our theft’s thieves might take some time. Link back to us at Sunday Stealing!

Sunday Stealing: The Eight Tens Meme

TEN TO START.

1. Are you single? no

2. Are you happy? yes

3. Are you bored? no

4. Are you naked? no

5. Are you a blonde? no

6. Are you moody? yes

7. Are you a lover/hater? lover

8. Are you hot/cold? cold

9. Are you Irish? yes

10. Are you Asian? no

TEN FACTS.

1. Name: Melissa

2. Nicknames: Missy, Meme

3. Birth mark: no

4. Hair color: reddish brown

5. Natural hair color: no

6. Eye color: hazel

7. Height:5’5″

8. Facebook Mood: happy

9. Favorite color: purple

10. One Place to Visit: Alaska

TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE.

1. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

2. Do you believe in soul mates? no

4. Have you ever been hurt emotionally? yes

5. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? yes

6. Have you ever been cheated on? yes

7. Have you ever liked someone and not told them? yes

8. Are you afraid of commitment? no

9. Who was the last person you hugged? daughter

10. Who was the last person you kissed? husband

TEN THIS OR THAT


1. Love or lust? love

3. Cats or dogs? dogs

4. A few best friends or many regular friends? friends

5. Television or internet? internet

6. Chinese Or Indian? chinese

7. Wild night out or romantic night in? romantic night in

8. Money or Happiness? happiness

9. Night or day? night

10. MSN or phone? msn

TEN HAVE YOU EVER.

1. Been caught sneaking out? yes

2. Been skinny dipping? yes

3. Stolen? yes

4. Bungee jumped? no

5. Lied to someone you liked? yes

6. Finished an entire jaw breaker? no

8. Wanted an ex bf/gf back? yes

9. Cried because you lost a pet?yes

10. Wanted to disappear? yes

TEN PREFERENCES IN A PARTNER.

1. Smile or eyes? smile

2. Light or dark hair? bald

3. Hugs or kisses? hugs

4. Shorter or taller? taller

5. Intelligence or attraction? both

6. Romantic or spontaneous? romantic

7. Funny or serious both

8. Older or Younger? does not matter

9. Outgoing or quiet? outgoing

10. Sweet or Bad Ass? sweet

TEN HAVE YOU’S.

1. Ever performed in front of a large crowd? no

2. Ever done drugs? no

3. Ever been pregnant? yes

5. Ever been on a cheer leading team? no

6. Ever Been on a dance team? no

7. Ever been on a sports team? yes

8. Ever been in a drama play/production? yes

9. Ever owned a BMW, Mercedes Benz, Escalade, Hummer or Bentley? no

10. Ever been in a rap video? no

TEN LASTS.

1. Last phone call you made: can’t remember

2. Last person you hung out with: daughter

4. Last time you worked: 14 years ago

5. Last person you tackled: brother

6. Last person you IM’d: Ironian Knight

8. Last person(s) you went to the movies with: daughter

9. Last thing you missed: doctor’s appointment

10. Last thing you ate: bacon

Moderation

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I hated to do it but I have had to start moderating my comments. Someone decided to attempt to sell viagra in the comment sections of my blog. After about three attempts on their part to do this, I not only deleted what they said I also banned their IP address.

I apologize to those of you who are legitimate readers and commenters. I do think by moderating the comments it will keep my blog enjoyable, because we will not have to deal with spammers

Saturday Nine – Getting Punched In The Nose

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Welcome to Saturday: 9. What we’ve committed to our readers is that we will post 9 questions every Saturday. Sometimes the post will have a theme, and at other times the questions will be totally unrelated. Those weeks we do “random questions,” so-to-speak. We encourage you to visit other participants posts and leave a comment. Because we don’t have any rules, it is your choice. We hate rules. We love memes, however, and here is today’s meme!

Saturday 9: Just One Look

1. How vein are you about how you look?

Not very much

2. When you were little what was your favorite TV show?

I enjoyed a variety of tv shows, what is popping into my head now is Star Trek. Yes, I was a geek even when I was little.

3. If someone was going to make a movie or TV show about your life, who would play you and why?

Kathy Bates, because I think she is the only one who could play me right.

4. Who is your favorite Major League Baseball team? How about your favorite player?

passing on this question

5. What is your favorite baseball-related movie?

see answer to number four

6. What is one lesson you have learned in the past year?

to live a truthful life

7. Tell us about one of your childhood memories.

getting punched in the nose by the kid who took my brother’s bike and me chasing him all the way to his house so he could hide behind his mommy

8. How do you handle sticky situations? Do you have a method? If so, what is it?

I just tell the truth, now. Everyone involved just gets the truth.

9. Do you think people talk about you behind your back?

I am sure they do, and quite frankly I do not care.

Living A Truthful Life

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Are you living a truthful life? What does living a truthful life mean anyway? To me, living a truthful life means living an authentic life. It is a life where you are honest with yourself and the others in your life. It is life that follows the old saying of “The Truth Will Set You Free”. Stacy Sheasby of Inspring Joy Today does an excellent job of explaining that old saying.

Living a truthful life is not for the faint of heart. It is difficult, painful, confusing, and joyous all at the same. It requires effort, and internal introspection. It requires a person to be accountable for their own life, without any excuses.

I am attempting to live a truthful life. It is not something I have always attempted to do. In fact the majority of my life has been spent living an untruthful life. I have spent a lot of years lying to myself, lying to others, and just flat out living a lie. The different parts of me were compartmentalized. Part of me shown to this person, another part shown to me, while still yet another part for that group over there. No one, not even me, had access to the whole of me.

In her post, Stacy Sheasby, suggests that if the truth will set us free, then if we are not living a truthful life we are living in a prison. I agree with her. It is a prison of our own making, but never-the-less it is still a prison. My prison took the form of depression, a depression that endured most of my life, becoming more and more severe as I got older. Included in my prison were the Anxiety Guards, and the Panic Attack Warden. If I ever tried to step out of my depression prison cell the Anxiety Guards and the Panic Attack Warden would set off such fears in me that I always scurried back to my “safe” cell.

After many, many years in my self made prison, I grew tired, and hopeless. I chose a way of escaping that gave me an easy way out, one where I did not have to encounter the Anxiety Guards and the Panic Attack Warden. Even that escape did not work. I found myself waking up in a hospital, tethered to a bed and still in my prison.

I was told I had no choice but to begin therapy. I did. I really did not want to, but I did. The smartest move I made in my life was promising myself and others that I would always be truthful in my therapy sessions and with my psychiatrist and actually following through with that promise. So began my journey of attempting to live a truthful life. I could only manage it during those once a week, hour long sessions, but at least it was a beginning.

As time has gone by, and I have gained confidence, began to care about myself, and learned to look at and tell the truth about myself, I have gotten more into the habit of living a truthful life. It is still not easy, I do it more out of habit than actually wanting to do it, but I am attempting, every day, to live a truthful life.

I have experienced a few rewards as a result of my attempting to live a truthful life. My relationships with my family has improved. To think, all these years they have been waiting to hear what was on my mind and for me to set boundaries with them. My depression and anxiety has lessened a great deal. The best reward has been passing the lesson of living a truthful life on to my daughter and her “getting it”.

Anna recently had a accident and broke something of hers that had significant monetary value. She made the decision to not say anything to either me or her father about it. She had decided that since it was an expensive item that we would be mad if she told us. This morning I asked her about that item because I had noticed she had not been using it. She looked like a deer caught in headlights and then she ‘fessed up about the item being broken. I was mad, but I was able to use that as an opportunity to explain to her that there is nothing wrong with being mad, it is a real emotion. It is a truthful emotion. I was also able to use this incident to talk to her about living a truthful life. An hour or so after we had this conversation, she said that she “felt better” because she was no longer worried about being “found out”. She explained the feeling by saying it “felt like an annoying bug that would not go away”.

My hope is that by teaching her to live a truthful life now, she will not find herself locked up in a prison of her own making in the future. There is nothing more beautiful then someone who can live a truthful life from a young age and never has to experience the pain from being in prison for most of their life.

I have ventured more and more outside my depression prison, walking past the Anxiety Guards and Panic Attack Warden. In some ways I am still bound by that prison, but the more attempts I make at living a truthful life, the less hold depression, anxiety and panic attacks have on me. I am looking forward to the day when that prison has absolutely no hold on me.

Are you living a truthful life? Are you living in a prison of your own making? Are you honest with yourself about yourself? Are you honest with others about your thoughts and feelings? Are you honest without excuses? example, I could be happy but…

I am looking forward to seeing how everyone answers those questions.

Friday Funnies – Spring

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Welcome to Friday Funnies! I thought it would be fun to send out some jokes, funny quotes and even funny pictures every Friday. I think it will be a good way to get us geared up for the weekend. I got the idea from Maria at Conversations With Moms who sends out humorous stuff every Sunday.

Q. What season is it when you are on a trampoline?

A. Spring-time!

Q. Why is the letter A like a flower?

A. A bee (B) comes after it!

Q.If a rooster laid an egg on the tip of the roof, which way would the egg roll?

A.Roosters don’t lay eggs!

Q. Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?

A. The outside

Spring Break


Spring break—that’s when kids work on their tans and teachers work on their sanity.

Spring break—that’s when kids go wild someplace other than school.

Spring break – is when the only thing kids study is each other.

The college kids call it spring “break.” Their parents, however, call it spring “broke.”

Spring break – is when teenagers give their swimsuits a dry run.

Spring break—that’s when students take time off from football games, basketball games, dances, parties, and hanging out in bars, and go to Florida and relax.

Thousands of college kids head south to vacation on a shoestring. Or at least that’s what they wear on the beach.

Spring break is when the nation’s college kids demonstrate to the world how much they’ve learned.

Friday Frustrations – I Get Fed Up and Frustrated

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I am frustrated with my anxiety disorder. I had been doing so well with it for a while but in the last few weeks it as reared it ugly head.  My counselor has suggested that since my depression is getting better, that my anxiety was acting up a bit since I had more time and energy to devote to managing it.  What she says makes sense, but does not make it any less frustrating.

I am feeling particularly frustrated with my diabetes at the present moment.  Nothing is going wrong with it, I am just simply frustrated with giving myself four injections a day.  Sometimes it is just like it, I get fed up and frustrated with the whole process.

Good Versus Bad

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Intellectually, I have always known that there is good anger and bad anger, however, emotionally any type of anger would cause me a great deal of anxiety. This would be true whether I was the one who was angry or if it was someone else. Learning how to deal with my anger and the anger of others appropriately has been a life long battle that I have only managed to get a little ahead of since I have been seeing my counselor.

A few things I have learned about anger is that good anger propels us into action and promotes growth. Bad anger is destructive and stifles growth. Good anger causes us to protect ourselves from harm, physical or mental. Bad anger causes harm.

Expressing anger appropriately is a freeing experience. That is part of what makes it good anger. People who can express their anger appropriately can let go of what made them angry in the first place and then move on. They feel less weighed down because they are not carrying a bunch of anger with them every where they go.

Bad anger is expressed in an out of control manner. It is often the result of not expressing ourselves when we are angry about something and it sits there and simmers, finally boiling over and taking out anyone in its line of fire. People who express their anger in this way have a hard time distinguishing between what is something that truly makes them angry and something that just irritates them. In both situations they react with the same out of control behavior.

When I was growing up, due to how things were in my family at that time, I did not express my anger very often. I did not speak up to the person that made me angry. My anger would just sit there, it took on a physical feeling. It literally felt as if the anger was just sitting in the pit of my stomach. It helped contribute to why I was a sad and angry teenager. I can remember going weeks and weeks without really talking to anyone, even in school, and then someone doing something to irritate me. I would then react horribly and say things that were not very nice.

Through my whole adult life I have done that same thing. Stuffing my anger into the pit of my stomach, with it only coming out in an uncontrolled manner. Soon all that anger and perceived wrongs that I was stuffing away, started seeping out. I became a very bitter and angry person. Apparently, it was even noticeable to people who did not know me well. I would often hear comments, like I needed to smile more, or how pretty I looked with a smile. I just could not manage to smile though, not with what I had boiling inside me.

This bad anger allowed me to see the world and the people in it as ugly things. It allowed me to keep people at least an arm length away from me. It contributed to the anger I felt towards my parents. Bad anger made it easy for me to be a negative person all the time.

This bad anger did not cause my depression, it was just one of the contributing factors. One of the ways in which my depression manifested itself was a very nasty, hair trigger temper. The anger I would feel would be considerably out of proportion to what actually triggered it. It was as if all that anger I had stuffed inside of me needed to be let out and I would pick the first handy target to take it out on.

With the aid of my counselor and my medications I have managed to let a lot of my anger go. Most of that anger that I have had boiling inside me for over 20 years, is gone. I feel lighter and freer than I can remember having felt. before. Unfortunately, when this anger starting going away and my anxiety lessened as well, I initially failed to see the balancing act I would need to maintain

I was so pleased at not dragging around all that bitterness and anger anymore, that I avoided feeling angery at all costs. Even when someone treated me disrespectfully. I would allow them to treat me in a way that I did not deserve and not say anything about it as a way to avoid getting angry.

The other day I finally got it. There is nothing wrong with feeling angry. It is a valid emotion. It is how we manage our anger that determines if it is going to be a good anger or a bad anger. If we choose to let it sit and boil and then come out in inappropriate ways we are not managing it very well and we have allowed it to become bad anger. However, if we take the time to express it in an appropriate way and release it, and not allow it to reside in us, we are managing our (good) anger well.

In what ways do you express your anger? Would you consider it good anger or bad anger? Is there anything you would like to change about your own anger management?

Thursday Thirteen – March 18, 2010

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My list of thirteen this week is Thirteen Thursday Thirteen ideas I came up with and then rejected as being too difficult (meaning I could not think of thirteen things to go with them) or not good enough.

1. Thirteen reasons why I like Dog The Bounty Hunter and Crew

2. Thirteen things I have learned from Sponge Bob Square Pants.

3. Thirteen places I have been too.

4. Thirteen things I like about Sesame Street

5. Thirteen things I do everyday

6. Thirteen memes I participate in

7. Thirteen of my favorite blogs

8. Thirteen reasons why my thinking is off today

9. Thirteen things I like about Spring

10. Thirteen reasons why I liked the 80’s

11. Thirteen reasons why I get confused easily

12. Thirteen ways to cook a chicken

13. Thirteen reasons why I like to stay home