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Tag Archives: Positive Thinking
Positive Thinking – Mental Health Awareness
Not so long ago, my head was full of negativity. I would tell myself what a loser I was, I was always looking for the worst to happen, and in every situation I could only see the negative. All of that negativity affected my mood, and my attitude.
With the help and encouragement of my counselor, I began to change my thinking. Turning my thoughts to a more positive outlook. In the beginning this was very difficult for me. Months passed with me continuing to try to have more positive thinking. It became easier and easier. I noticed that my mood was improving. I had a more positive attitude about my life. I no longer worried all the time and I was much more relaxed. I became a more pleasant person to be around. I felt better because my thoughts were better.
Positive Thinking
Many people give themselves negative messages. Most of the time they do not realize they are doing it. Usually, it is something they learned as a child. They could have learned these negative messages from other children, teachers, family, caregivers, and society. Once a person has learned them, they tend to repeat them over and over to themselves, especially during a difficult time in life. They come to believe what the negative messages are saying, and often create their own to add to what they are already repeating to themselves. These negative thoughts or messages lower a person’s self-esteem and make them feel bad about themselves.
Some common messages that people repeat over and over to themselves are “I never do anything right,” “No one likes me,” “I am a loser,” “I am stupid.” Most people believe these messages about themselves, no matter how untrue they are. The messages tend to point out the worst in a person and they are hard to turn off and unlearn.
However, they can be turned off and replaced with positive messages and thoughts. To start, you need to pay attention to your thoughts. Every time you have a negative thought or give yourself a negative message, ask yourself a few questions. Is this message really true? Would I say this to another person? If not then why am I saying it to myself? What do I get out of saying this message? If it makes me feel bad then why not stop using it?
Once you are aware of when and what negative thoughts and messages you are saying to yourself you can start replacing them with positive ones. Since you cannot think two thoughts at the same time, if you are thinking something positive you will not be able to have negative thoughts. When you are creating your new messages, remember to use positive words like, wonderful, good, smart, loving.
After you have created your new, positive messages, start repeating them to yourself over and over. Write them over and over if you need to. Put them in places where you can see them daily, as a reminder to you. The refrigerator, the bathroom mirror, the door you use to leave your house, as a screen saver on your computer are all good places to put them.
Changing your negative thoughts to positive ones, will take time and persistence. If you stick with it, in a few weeks you will notice that you have fewer negative thoughts and when they do pop up you will have positive messages to replace them with. You will also notice that your attitude will change for the better and you will feel physically better as a result of less stress and worry.
Living A Truthful Life
Are you living a truthful life? What does living a truthful life mean anyway? To me, living a truthful life means living an authentic life. It is a life where you are honest with yourself and the others in your life. It is life that follows the old saying of “The Truth Will Set You Free”. Stacy Sheasby of Inspring Joy Today does an excellent job of explaining that old saying.
Living a truthful life is not for the faint of heart. It is difficult, painful, confusing, and joyous all at the same. It requires effort, and internal introspection. It requires a person to be accountable for their own life, without any excuses.
I am attempting to live a truthful life. It is not something I have always attempted to do. In fact the majority of my life has been spent living an untruthful life. I have spent a lot of years lying to myself, lying to others, and just flat out living a lie. The different parts of me were compartmentalized. Part of me shown to this person, another part shown to me, while still yet another part for that group over there. No one, not even me, had access to the whole of me.
In her post, Stacy Sheasby, suggests that if the truth will set us free, then if we are not living a truthful life we are living in a prison. I agree with her. It is a prison of our own making, but never-the-less it is still a prison. My prison took the form of depression, a depression that endured most of my life, becoming more and more severe as I got older. Included in my prison were the Anxiety Guards, and the Panic Attack Warden. If I ever tried to step out of my depression prison cell the Anxiety Guards and the Panic Attack Warden would set off such fears in me that I always scurried back to my “safe” cell.
After many, many years in my self made prison, I grew tired, and hopeless. I chose a way of escaping that gave me an easy way out, one where I did not have to encounter the Anxiety Guards and the Panic Attack Warden. Even that escape did not work. I found myself waking up in a hospital, tethered to a bed and still in my prison.
I was told I had no choice but to begin therapy. I did. I really did not want to, but I did. The smartest move I made in my life was promising myself and others that I would always be truthful in my therapy sessions and with my psychiatrist and actually following through with that promise. So began my journey of attempting to live a truthful life. I could only manage it during those once a week, hour long sessions, but at least it was a beginning.
As time has gone by, and I have gained confidence, began to care about myself, and learned to look at and tell the truth about myself, I have gotten more into the habit of living a truthful life. It is still not easy, I do it more out of habit than actually wanting to do it, but I am attempting, every day, to live a truthful life.
I have experienced a few rewards as a result of my attempting to live a truthful life. My relationships with my family has improved. To think, all these years they have been waiting to hear what was on my mind and for me to set boundaries with them. My depression and anxiety has lessened a great deal. The best reward has been passing the lesson of living a truthful life on to my daughter and her “getting it”.
Anna recently had a accident and broke something of hers that had significant monetary value. She made the decision to not say anything to either me or her father about it. She had decided that since it was an expensive item that we would be mad if she told us. This morning I asked her about that item because I had noticed she had not been using it. She looked like a deer caught in headlights and then she ‘fessed up about the item being broken. I was mad, but I was able to use that as an opportunity to explain to her that there is nothing wrong with being mad, it is a real emotion. It is a truthful emotion. I was also able to use this incident to talk to her about living a truthful life. An hour or so after we had this conversation, she said that she “felt better” because she was no longer worried about being “found out”. She explained the feeling by saying it “felt like an annoying bug that would not go away”.
My hope is that by teaching her to live a truthful life now, she will not find herself locked up in a prison of her own making in the future. There is nothing more beautiful then someone who can live a truthful life from a young age and never has to experience the pain from being in prison for most of their life.
I have ventured more and more outside my depression prison, walking past the Anxiety Guards and Panic Attack Warden. In some ways I am still bound by that prison, but the more attempts I make at living a truthful life, the less hold depression, anxiety and panic attacks have on me. I am looking forward to the day when that prison has absolutely no hold on me.
Are you living a truthful life? Are you living in a prison of your own making? Are you honest with yourself about yourself? Are you honest with others about your thoughts and feelings? Are you honest without excuses? example, I could be happy but…
I am looking forward to seeing how everyone answers those questions.