I am going to do something a little different with my blog today….The other day when I had to go to the doctor and so did my mother and grandmother, I took a camera with me.  I thought it would be fun to blog about the day and have pictures with it. Enjoy!!

In my opinion, my family is special.  I know many people think this about their families, but mine really is.  Just extending from my branch of the family tree, we have four generations of beautiful, bold, intelligent, and strong southern women.  At times our strong personality traits cause us to clash, but we all truly love each other.  The older I get the more I realize, despite the past rockiness of our relationships, how deeply that love runs.  

Today (January 26, 2010) was treat.  For the first time in a long time, my grandmother, mother, me and my daughter all got to spend the whole day together.  For me, it will be a wonderful memory to add to our family’s story. 

The Cast Of Characters

Grandma-Chris Ingram                Mom-Regena Shell        Me-Melissa Mashburn      Daughter – Anna

Some how, my grandmother, my mother, me and even my dad all ended up seeing the same pulmonologist, Dr. Szumstein at Georgia Lung Associates.  He also treats me and my mother for Restless Leg Syndrome.  Dr. Szumstein appears to think it is interesting and rather neat that he treats four generations of one family.  

Georgia Lung Associates has two offices.  The largest one that offers a great many services is further away from us than the smaller location is.  It so happened that my grandmother, my mother and I all needed to go to Georgia Lung Associates around the same time this month.  My grandmother needed to go to the larger office for a test and my mother and I needed to go to the smaller office to see Dr. Szumstein.  We decided it would be easiest if we all went down together. 






Grandma’s appointment was in the morning and mine and mom’s appointments were in the afternoon.  We knew we would be gone all day.  This is the type of day I normally would have hated.  To be that far away from my house for that huge amount of time would have triggered my anxiety. Instead of being the awful day that it would have been in the past, it was a good day with amusing moments that happened all day long.

The plan was for me to meet my grandmother and mother at my grandmother’s house and we all would leave from there.  My mother very specifically told me that she would be leaving Grandma’s house at eight in the morning, giving us two hours to get to where we needed to go for Grandma’s appointment.  Translated that means, I needed to get to Grandma’s house before eight in the morning so we could leave on time. 

The night before we were to have this adventure my mother called.  I assumed she was calling to remind me about our departure time. 

Sometimes I live in my very own time zone, making it difficult to get to where I need to be at the time I am supposed to be there.  My family realizes this fact, so they always make sure I am extremely aware about what time we will be leaving.  

Not only was she calling to remind me when we would be leaving, she also was calling to let me know that after my grandmother’s appointment and before ours we would eating lunch at Gabriel’s .  It is a restaurant owned and operated by Paula Dean’s Cousin.  

Mom seemed very excited about the prospect that we would all be eating there.  She said the lunch food was very good, however, the desserts rocked.  I also got very excited, seeing as how I love good food. 

The morning of all of our appointments went smoothly for me.  I got up and did my usual morning stuff…coffee, computer breakfast, computer, shower, computer…you get the picture.  My daughter is a little difficult to get up in the mornings, so I told her she could have coke for breakfast if she would just get up without arguing.  She actually posted on facebook that she was having coke for breakfast.

All this computer time, led to us leaving the house a little late.  I was not concerned, I figured I could make up our late departure on the dirt road that I take to get to my grandmother’s house. Unfortunately, not only do I live in my own time zone, I am also not the most organized person.  I knew it was cold outside, but it did not even occur to me to warm the truck up before we left. 

When we walked out the door to get into the truck, I began to wish I had taken the time to warm it up.  There was a layer off ice all over the wind shield.  I started the truck and was actually going to drive it to Grandma’s house, icy wind shield and all, but I quickly realized that I could not see anything.  Anna was very nice and let me use her Subway Restaurant gift card to scrape a small section of ice away so I could drive.  

Dealing with the icy truck cost me some more time, so we we were definitely running late by that point.  I had already decided that I would blame our lateness on the icy truck and just leave out the part where we kept getting on our computers.  

At one minute past eight, my mother calls us on my cell phone.  Anna answered it and the gist of it was that it was after eight and where were we.  We happened to be at the end of the long drive way that goes to my grandmother’s house, so we were not going to be super late.  When we pulled into Grandma’s yard, I saw that not only had my mother been more organized than me, by heating up her car before it was time to go, but she also had it turned around, pointing toward the end of the driveway.  I got my late excuse ready.

I never had a chance to use my carefully thought out, “The ice made me late” excuse.  My mother held up her fancy phone and said she knew we had been on the computer, because she had seen that we had been posting stuff on facebook.  The only thing I could say after that was “Anna, we got busted”.  I had to laugh and say to myself, “You have to be careful of what you put on facebook”

It was a rather long ride to Grandma’s appointment, but everyone was in a good mood and chatting so the time seemed to go by quickly.  It was not until we had been on the road for a while that we ran into our first bit of traffic.

Despite my tardiness earlier in the morning, we were running ahead of schedule.  Which was good when we encountered the traffic, because no one got stressed out about  being late for anything.

I have this strange habit of collecting bits of miscellaneous information in my head.  Once my brother told me I would make a good librarian because of it.  That very morning, way early in the morning, I happened to watch a show on Animal Planet that was about mysteries in nature.  One segment in particular caught my attention.  I decided that this car ride would be a great time to share the information I learned.  I do not think the other people in the car agreed with me.  

The first segment of this television show was about some birds on an island in Scotland.  I cannot remember the name of the birds, but they make their nests in holes in the ground.  Near the time the babies are able to fly, they start coming out of the nests and wandering around some.  On many mornings, people would find lots of those baby birds, dead with no apparent injuries, except that they would be missing their heads.  Researchers discovered that the deer on this island were eating the heads off of the young birds.  Carnivorous deer!  See, that is interesting. 

 

You can read about these meat eating deer here

Rum health diet drives deer to snack on chicks

Because we were doing so good on our time management that morning, obviously someone else was in charge of the schedule, we arrived at the office for Grandma’s appointment pretty early.  We decided to go ahead and park, and go inside, hoping that maybe Grandma would be seen early for her test.


 

A cool thing about going anywhere with my mother and grandmother is that they have those handicap signs that are hung on the rear view mirror.  So there are no long walks from the very back of the parking lot.

We went to the waiting room that Grandma needed to be in.  She filled out her paper work and we made ourselves comfortable in case it turned out to be a long wait.

I am not really a baseball fan, but even I was impressed with some of the baseball memorabilia that the founder of the practice had placed in the waiting room.

Grandma was finished with her test in record time.  We were running even further ahead on our schedule now.  We decided to go ahead and head over to PaulaDean’sCounsin’sRestaurant (this must be said all as one word and very fast).  We were not sure if they would be serving lunch yet, we were hoping they would be.  However, none of us would have been horribly disappointed if we had been forced to eat dessert for lunch.

We ended up only having to wait ten minutes for lunch to be served at PaulaDean’sCousin’sRestaurant/ Gabriels .  

  

We decided to spend those ten minutes looking at all our dessert options.  You can never put too much time in deciding what dessert you want, it is an important decision.

 

When we were able to order our lunches, I got a blackened shrimp po’boy, my mother got a roasted garden vegetable sandwich, my grandmother got a plate full of their lunch vegetables and Anna got a ham and cheese sandwich (boring!)

I got a very big thrill when I went to get mine and my grandmother’s tea.  There was this boss looking lady who was near the ice machine, talking to one of the staff members. She sounded just like Paula Dean!  I am convinced that she was Paula Dean’s cousin.  I wanted to just reach out and touch her so I could say I had touched greatness, but then I thought I might freak her out in a weird kind of stalker way.  

Our lunch food was very, very good.  I shared some of my blacked shrimp po’boy with mom and she shared some of her roasted garden vegetable sandwich with me. 

After we ate all that wonderful food, it was time for dessert.  Yes, I did have dessert.&nb
sp; I had to adjust my insulin amounts to account for it, but those desserts looked too good to pass up.  Anna had a strawberry chantilly, my mother had a slice of fudge pie, and I had a small canolli.  That was good stuff!

  
Anna must have really enjoyed her dessert, because while she was eating it she was absolutely silent and this is all she left on her plate.

With full tummies we all got back into the car to head to our next destination.  We were still way ahead of our schedule.  After all that good food, and being in the warmth of the car, I got very sleepy.  I guess I fell asleep and there was some snoring involved.  The next thing I am aware of, is waking up in the parking lot of the Animal Hospital where my brother works.  It seems while I was sleeping other people in the car decided to kill some time since we had a long while until mine and my mother’s appointments.  

Besides being at an unplanned stop the other thing I noticed is my mother had a bag full of Krystal Burgers.  I wondered where these mysterious burgers came from.  It seems I was sleeping so soundly, that my mother called my brother and found out what he wanted for lunch, and drove through the Krystal drive thru, without me even waking up.  My mother stopped by his work to deliver his Krystal burger lunch.  What a nice mom she was for doing that!

My brother was very busy with surgeries when we got there.  He did stop long enough to shove the bag full of Krystal burgers into his mouth.

I am sure my brother appreciated the fortitude that the Krystal burgers brought him on his busy day, and it was a nice treat to see him at work.  

Due to how tired I am and how I keep dozing off, I am going to stop here tonight, I will finish everything up tomorrow.

A very sweet young man, messaged me last night.  He first complemented me on my attempt at coding, then he let me know that my layout was not showing up properly in Google Chrome.  I checed IE and it was not there either.  So once again, I was back to coding.  I really had to do it this time though.  I had to fix things so that they would show up in more than just the firefox browser I use.  I downloaded Chrome, when I finished and it appears to be working fine there now, same with IE.  

I really will not touch my coding for a very long time.  No need to mess things up again.  

Before you get carried away and let your mind wander down a trail of romantic and erotic intrigue, stop. We’re not talking about that kind of fire. Not today anyway. We’re talking about intellect, entertainment and adventure. I’d like you to take a look at the what makes you happy and brings you joy. Pretend you are talking to a new friend. Answer the questions as enthusiastically as you can and share with your friend what lights your fire. Recommend your favorites, what you’re passionate about – and tell us why. If it’s too hard to choose just one, narrow it down to the best of the best. Everyone who reads your answers will not only get a better sense of who you are but we might be inspired to check it out upon your expert recommendation. I like learning something new everyday. If you open the door of my imagination, I just might step through. Tell me!

1. Which historical figure do you admire the most? Why?

I have to admit that I just have not thought about a historical figure that I admired.  I do have a real life person I admire.  My Grandmother.

She grew up in a time and place where money was always short.  

Although she was not the oldest girl in her house, she was left to take care of her sick mother.  When she was a child it was still unusual for girls to graduate from high school, most got married young.  She not only graduated, she also played on her school’s basketball team.

Every single one of her brothers and her husband, his brothers, and most of the boys in the families she was friends with, went to fight during War World II.  She was left to take care of a small baby and her mother while they were gone.  She stayed strong the whole time people she knew and loved were in the war.  

She worked outside the home when it was still not common to see women doing that.  She made all my mother’s clothes, with no store bought patterns.  She could look at an outfit and figure out in her head how to make a pattern and she would create her own pattern out of newspaper.  She taught me how to make brooms out of broom straw.  

She, even now and she is almost 90, has the best gardens.  Better than professional gardeners most of the time.  She can get the smallest vegetable plant to produce tons of vegetables.  She can stick a stick from a tree in the ground and grow her own trees.  

Her home is always open to her loved ones.  She loves her family deeply and has done so much for everyone.  She remembers how my daughter loves her home made french fries and makes them for her often.  When I was a single parent and she and I shared a house she would get up every morning and cook me breakfast before I left for work.  Or when I was working at night, she would make me home made pimento cheese so I could make myself a sandwich when I got home from work.  

I admire her for her capacity for unconditional love.

2. Name the band or artist you’d like to see live in concert before you leave the planet or tell us about a concert or album that has already rocked your world.


I am not really into music too much….however, I still remember the first ever concert I went to as a teen.  Culture Club with Boy George.  

3. What’s your favorite television show or series of all time?
Why should I care?

ER was my favorite all time television series.  I do not think I missed more than a handful of episodes the whole time it was on TV.  I have no idea why you should care…..but if you are my friend you will care because I care.

4. Movies! I am so behind on the movie scene. What should I watch this weekend? Should I watch it alone or with someone?

Fried Green Tomatoes  Still my favorite movie.  Watch it with a friend.  Movies are always better when you are watching them with a friend.  That way when you say a quote from the movie, it is like a private joke.  

My favorite line from the movie is “Face it girls, I am older and have more insurance”  and I also like the alter ego named “Twanda”

5. You are hopping on a plane tomorrow morning. Where did you choose to go and why?

I am going to Thailand.  Ever since I did a report on Thailand, when I was in fifth grade, I have always been fascinated with Thailand.  I have made it to other places in Asia, but never Thailand. 

6. Who is your favorite author? What about their writing inspires you or simply entertains you? Recommend at least one book that you feel I must read.

Picking one author is so hard.  Depending on my mood, I pick different authors.  If I had to pick, it would be Stephen King.  He is the author that I have stuck with the longest, I have been reading him since I was a teenager.  I would recommend the whole Tower series, and/or Duma Key.

There are so many things I enjoy about his books.  I have also really enjoyed seeing how his writing has changed over the years.  I like how he can make the not real seem real, I like the hidden messages he leaves in his books.  I love how he really seems to appreciate the people who read his book
s. 

7. Hobbies and passions. What brings you joy in your spare time? How did you get into it?

Cross stitching is something I have done since I was a teenager.  I got into because it looked hard and I like challenges.  I taught myself how to crochet a few years ago for the same reason.  When my mind is healthy, I am passionate about volunteering.  


I will be honest though, at this time in my life I get more joy, satisfaction I call it, from being able to do normal every day things.  Until a short time ago, being able to do normal every day things was an impossibility for me, because of my depression.


Oh, I do get a lot out of my blog.  I enjoy messing around with it all the time.

On February 19th, 1970, in Paducah, Kentucky, the second cutest baby girl in the world (my daughter holds the first place position) was born.  There is some debate about the time of birth, one of my parental units says it happened at night, the other parental unit says it was in the morning.  I have no opinion either way, as I have no memory of it.


As I was growing up, I enjoyed birthdays.  One of my favorite birthday memories is when we lived in Spain.  My mother learned how to make pinatas.  These were not the simple little pinatas you see in the stores around here.  My mother’s were art pieces.  Very detailed, and if my memory is correct, they were fairly large.  She made a pinata for my birthday, and filled it with candy and toys.  

Our apartment building was on a hill and we were on the second or third floor.  When it came time to beat on the pinata, my mother just hung it over our balcony, while the kids were gathered in the road below.  The best part of this whole birthday,was when the pinata was broken and all the toys and candy fell out.  My mother had put a bunch of those super bouncy balls inside the pinata.  Since we lived on a hill, some of those super bouncy balls started bouncing down the hill with kids running behind them.  That memory still makes me smile.  

Another birthday memory that makes me smile is the year I got to go the Ringling Brothers, and Barnum and Baily Circus on my birthday.  To this day, that circus comes to Atlanta right around my birthday, the commercials for it always bring back memories.  That was the year that Coca-Cola shirts were very popular.  I was given one of those for that birthday.  I think that may have also been around the time that I discovered cookie cakes.  They were not everywhere like they are now.  There was one place that I knew that had them and it was in Town Center mall.  So for my family to get me a cookie cake was a huge deal for me.  

By the time I was a seventeen or eighteen, I believe that I was already experiencing my first round of depression.  I was a sad and lonely teen, who really did not care about birthdays anymore.  I was already having a few suicidal thoughts at that time, and I truly thought that one way or another my life would be over by the time I was twenty.



On my twentieth birthday, I was pregnant with my son, who was to be born two days later.  I felt so old on that birthday.  It was a very difficult time.  My husband (we divorced a long time ago) was not in the same state I was in, he was not sending any money to me.  I felt abandoned and alone.  I was very sad.  I believe that if it were not for my pregnancy and my son, I probably would have attempted suicide at that time.

Every birthday after that seemed to sneak up on me.  I was not thrilled about them, nor was I upset.  I was more surprised than anything else.  Surprised that I had even made it to another birthday.  Looking back I was probably depressed on and off for most of my twenties and thirties. 


Even when I was not having suicidal thoughts, I was still taken by surprise when each birthday rolled around.  It always seemed, to me at least, that I had already passed that age at which I thought I would die, so I always felt like I was living on borrowed time.  As my depression grew worse and I was having suicidal thoughts all the time, I would often tell myself that I would not be alive on my fortieth birthday.  


Here I am though, three weeks until my fortieth birthday, thinking about how that makes me feel.  I did everything to prevent this birthday from taking place.  I truly wished to die.  Yet, here I am.  I am alive.  What an odd feeling, with everything I did to prevent it.


 My fortieth birthday is actually the first birthday I have looked forward to since I was a young teenager.  I am not looking forward to it for presents, or for a party.  I am looking forward to it because to me it represents  a “New Life” celebration. I can start from there forward with liking and loving myself in a way I never thought possible.



My fortieth birthday and the word hope seem to go hand in hand. I have a feeling of genuine hope and satisfaction, for the first time in my life.  I will be starting off a new “birth year” with hope.  I will be starting off a new “birth year” with an excitement that I cannot ever remember having.  I am looking forward to this new life of mine.