I do not know about other people who live with depression but I very often feel as if I have less control over my depression when my environment is negative. The negativity could be caused by people’s drama, certain songs on the radio, movies, or even television shows.
Being so new in my depression recovery, not even a year, I know that it would be very easy for me to have a serious set back and lose a lot of the ground I have gained so far in my recovery. In an effort to protect that, I have made certain ground rules for myself to keep my environment as positive as possible.
1. No drama. Family or otherwise. If someone attempts to draw me into their drama, I close off communication. Sometimes permanently, sometimes only temporarily. It just depends on how drama prone the person is. I know how I am. Drama feeds into the anger I have, which then feeds into my rage, I say something I regret, whic then feeds into my depression. Or the drama just flat out depresses me.
2. No surrounding myself with negative people with negative thoughts and actions. I have even gone so far as to forbid negative comments from my family. Constructive advice is good, negative comments are bad. That includes gossiping about others. Gossip is negative. I strictly follow the rule of “if you cannot say anything nice, do not say anything at all”.
3. I always look for at least three positive things for every not so wonderful situation. Sometimes finding three positive things is difficult or impossible, but I always attempt to find those three things. That way I am always guaranteed to have a minimum of one positive thing about every situation. Sometimes the positive things are silly. For example, when it looked like I might have to be in the hospital for Christmas, one of the nurses decided to help me decorate my room and I was looking forward to seeing Santa Claus in the hospital on Christmas day.
4. I will no longer watch certain types of television shows or movies and a lot of times I will not watch the news. This is not to isolate myself, as has been implied by some people, but it is an effort to keep my surroundings as positive as possible. Real life human tragedies cause me to react in an over exaggerated emotional manner. To put it plainly, other people’s tragedies become mine and I react to them as if they were mine. It is debilitating. I am in no way ready to be put in that situation yet. I have yet to watch one single bit of news about Haiti, I see headlines go across my RSS feed ticker. That is enough for me right now.
Same with movies and television shows. If they show human tragedy, I cannot watch them. Recently, I watched my Sister’s Keeper. It was a wonderful movie. However, for a couple of days after seeing it, I was depressed. None of the previews prepared me for the ending.
Following these rules, as best as I can, does help me. What I have gained so far in my depression recovery is very precious to me. I guard it as best as I can on a daily basis. There are days when I do have slip ups and I “break” one of my own rules. I never beat myself up about it. I acknowledge to myself that I messed up and just move on.
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense.”
–– Ralph Waldo Emerson
If anyone wants to, I would love to hear what other people do to maintain a positive attitude.











