Post-It-Note Blessings
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Post-It-Note Blessings
Absolutely Remarkable
The last couple of days could have been emotionally draining. They definitely could have been upsetting and even depressing. There is no doubt in my mind that they would have been even just a couple of months ago. However, something absolutely remarkable has happened. I have discovered I can laugh about the horrible things Joe Bob says to me.
The electricity at the house I used to live in with Joe Bob was in my name. I had not told the electric company to disconnect it, because I was under the impression that Joe Bob would have some difficulty having it transferred to his name. However, the situation never felt quite “right” to me.
Last week, the electric bill became two months past due. Joe Bob could only afford to pay for one month of the past due balance. Unfortunately, the electric company has a policy that once an account is two months past due, the whole balance must be paid, or they will still disconnect the service. Which is exactly what happened on Monday.
After thinking about the situation, I decided to not allow it to be reconnected in my name. I do not live in that house anymore and since it had been disconnected I thought it would be a good time to get it transferred into someone else’s name. Joe Bob was less than pleased with my decision.
He voiced his displeasure in the his usual way – insulting me. He even went so far as to tell me that I “could not function” without my medication. Rather than upsetting me, his insults actually made me chuckle.
I guess I have finally reached a point where I finally understand that his insults are nothing more than words. The words only have the power that I give them. If I do not give them power then they cannot hurt me. It is rather freeing to not feel so emotionally tied in to what someone says to me and about me. I like this feeling. I wish it had not taken me so long to get to this point with him, but everything is a process and at least I am now.
Post-It-Note- Blessings
Post-It-Note Blessings
I decided to do something a little different for Counting My Blessings. I thought it might be fun and interesting, if I put a blessing a day on a post-it-note. I was thinking it might work out better than the list of blessings I usually do. It would be a good way for me to be reminded daily of just how many blessings there are in my life.
Spiders – Blog Gang
This week’s Blog Gang topic is Spiders. I really do not like spiders. I wonder what Susie Kline of Motherhoot was thinking when she came up this topic.
There is no good reason for why spiders creep me out, but they do. There is just something about them that gives me the shivers, and makes my skin crawl. When I was younger I had two different methods for making spiders go away. One involved hairspray, the other involved a shoe. I tried very hard to not let my children see how much spiders bothered me. I did not want to teach them to be afraid of them too. Somehow, my son was able to figure out that I had a problem with spiders and played a very mean trick on me. To this day I find spiders very creepy but instead of freaking out when I see one, I react very differently.
As a young adult, I had a couple of different methods for dealing with spiders. One was the tried and true method of smashing them with a shoe. The other required a bit more effort, but gave me supreme pleasure. This method required two pieces of equipment. One piece of equipment was a bottle of hairspray, and the other was a vacuum cleaner. The first step in the vacuum cleaner hairspray method was to spray a spider with the hairspray until it could no longer move. Once incapacitated, I would suck it up into the vacuum cleaner. I probably dispatched thousands of creepy spiders this way. Every once in a while the thought of all those spiders in a vacuum cleaner bag would give me a nightmare that always ended the same way. The vacuum cleaner bag would burst open, and thousands of hairsprayed spiders would spill out in search of revenge. As bad as that nightmare was, it was nothing compared to the horrible thing my son did to me with a spider.
For some reason, I allowed my son to get a pet tarantula. He really liked his spider and could handle it with no problem. During the time he had this large spider in his room, I found out that I needed some minor foot surgery. Before the surgery took place, the doctor gave me the list of post-operation instructions. One of the items on the list stated that for at least the first 24 hours after the surgery I would need to keep my foot elevated. I did not see any problem with this, I figured I could just lay on the couch, prop my foot up, and watch TV. My son had different plans for me.
A couple of days before my surgery was scheduled, my son came to me and told me that his spider had escaped. I did not believe him. I had to see for myself. Sure enough, when I checked the container his spider was supposed to be in, it was gone! He assured me he had checked his room very carefully, and could not find it. I could not help him look for it because I was afraid I would be the one to find it. I wandered back in the living room with only one thing on my mind.
All I could think about was THE SPIDER. The big, hairy, tarantula that I let him buy was loose in the house! I had a vision. It was of me laying on the couch with my foot propped up, and I was waking up from a nap. When I opened my eyes the only thing I could see was the GIANT SPIDER sitting on my chest. I knew that if that spider was not found, my vision would become a reality. I was near the point of panic.
It was not long before my son came to me and let me know that he had found the spider. I was very relieved for a brief moment. That feeling of relief rapidly went away when my son confessed he had let the spider out on purpose, and that he had done it to scare me. He was very pleased with himself, and my reaction to his prank. After that, every day I wondered and worried if my son was going to set his spider free again.
I learned something very valuable that night, sons and spiders can sense your fear. Since then, I have never let either see the look of fear in my eyes.
Managing Depression – Challenge Your Thinking
Learning how to manage my depression took more than just swallowing the right pill, and spilling my guts to a counselor. It required a great deal of hard work on my part. In the beginning, it was very difficult for me to even think about putting any effort into my own treatment process. Depression left me feeling totally exhausted and unmotivated. I was also very comfortable with my negative view of everything and everyone, including myself.
I remember feeling very irritated when my counselor challenged my negative thinking. By making me aware of how negative my perception of reality was, she was in essence making me take ownership for my own feelings. I did not want to own them! It was so much easier to have other people be responsible for how I felt.
Once I was aware of my role in how I felt, I realized that I was the one in charge of whether or not I became mentally healthier. The choice was mine and I hated that. I resisted making a choice for as long as I could. I realize now that not making a choice is really making a choice.
Eventually, I decided that I was tired of feeling the way I did, by that time the depression medications were helping even me out some. I knew that I would have to make some sort of effort to get better but I was still exhausted and still lacked motivation. It took me a while but eventually I understood I would have to make an effort despite how I felt.
I told myself to “suck it up” and “get on with it”. I know that sounds harsh but that is what I kept saying to myself. “Suck it up” and “do it” even though I was tired and it made me feel uncomfortable. It is what I needed to hear from myself at the time. I needed to push myself into uncomfortable situations and thought processes so I could get mentally healthier.
With the help and guidance of my counselor I began challenging my thinking by doing the following things:
I know, believe me I KNOW how much depression hurts. It does not matter what the root cause of your depression is, YOU CAN CHOOSE to do something about it. Think about it from this perspective; if you had a leg injury and had to have physical therapy to help it heal, the exercises you had to do in physical therapy would hurt. You would have to push through some of that pain to get your leg strong again and to help it heal. Most likely, your leg would be sore for several days after a physical therapy session. Choosing to be proactive in learning how to manage your depression is like that physical therapy session, it will hurt and it will be uncomfortable. Most likely, the emotional pain that is created by taking a step to help yourself mentally heal will last for several days. You need to push through the pain. It is even okay to tell yourself to “suck it up” and “get on with it”.
The Kidney Update
Yesterday, was not a fun day. I had to have some blood drawn for a thyroid test my doctor ordered. I also had to leave a urine sample for something called a micro albumin test. Originally, the urine sample was going to have to be sent to a lab to be analyzed, because the machine that the clinic has to perform that particular test was not working. However, today it was working properly.
The lady who took had to stick me for the blood sample had only graduated from school two weeks ago. My veins scared her. She made me wait until there was no one else needing blood drawn, so she could spend a great deal of time on me. It worked. She took her time and was able to hit a vein, on the first try, in the back of one of my hands. While I was waiting for her to get through everyone else, I went over to where I needed to pee in a cup.
I had a special urine test done called a microalbumin test. Webmd explains what microalbumin is, as well as the test much better than I could.
A microalbumin test checks urine for the presence of a protein called albumin. Albumin is normally found in the blood and filtered by the kidneys. When the kidneys are working properly, albumin is not present in the urine. But when the kidneys are damaged, small amounts of albumin leak into the urine. This condition is called microalbuminuria.
My microalbummin level was significantly higher than it was the last time I had this test done. That means the kidney damage has progressed.
I am not sure what happens from here. I go to a free clinic and it looks like they have no appointments available until at least the beginning of August, but it is hard to tell because the appointment desk did not have their August calendar quite yet.
I am trying to not be worried. So far the results have been mixed. I know worrying will not do me any good, so when I do start I try to redirect my thinking.
Counting My Blessings
Image found on "My Time" a blog by Lori Shrout
Counting my blessings makes me feel good. It reminds me of all the wonderful things I have in my life. Even if I do not take the time to write them down, counting my blessings is something I do every day.
Some of the blessings I am counting this week are:
Flying Purple People Eaters Are Great Pets
That is a catchy title, isn’t it? I thought I would use it to get your attention and to help explain what I do for my job.
My job title is Content Writer. Content writing is a fairly new form of writing that only exists because the Internet does. In a way, it is similar to writing a persuasive essay. Basically, what I do is write website content. I take a client’s keywords and/or keyword phrases, research the keywords, and write an article that is anywhere between 100 words to 500 words about the information I found during the research process. At various – but fairly specific – places throughout the article I have to use the keywords and/or the keyword phrases that the client supplied. I get paid by the amount of words I type.
Keywords and keyword phrases are usually based on research the client has done to determine what people are plugging into search engines. Sometimes the clients use key word phrases that have poor grammar, however, I still have to use them exactly the way the client wants.
Some clients are very specific about how they want the informative article written. Sometimes they want me to write about a particular aspect of the item or service. However, there are times when all I get is the keywords and/or the keyword phrase and it is up to me to decide what want angle I want to take in the article.
The company guidelines state that unless the client says differently, the main keyword should be in the first sentence of the first paragraph and in the first sentence of the last paragraph. The main key word should also be in the title, and the title needs to contain at least four words. The guidelines also state that there should be an opening paragraph and a closing paragraph, and every paragraph in the article should have at least three sentences. Each article has a minimum word count and every article I write has to have at least the minimum amount of requested words in it. However, if I go over that word count I am not paid for the extra words, so I do my very best to keep it to the minimum.
Here is an example of the instructions I might receive:
Minimum word count: 330
Main keyword: Flying Purple People Eaters
Other keywords: flying purple people eater, alien, pet, pets
If I were to turn that information into an article it might look something like this:
Flying Purple People Eaters Are Great Pets
With their purple fur and long claws, Flying Purple People Eaters certainly look different than the average dog or cat. Contrary to what the name implies, a tame Flying Purple People Eater will not randomly eat people. They are actually terrific, family pets. If you are looking for a pet for your family, you might want to consider this unusual creature.
Since these furry aliens first landed, scientists have been working to tame them. They have been successful and now Flying Purple People Eaters are available for every family who wishes to own one. Since the taming process has rendered them incapable of eating even the most annoying child, you can let them play with your kids for hours without worrying that anyone might lose a finger or a toe. You can also use these unusual pets for more than just entertaining your children.
If you have a little, yappy dog that gets on your nerves, a Flying Purple People Eater might be the perfect solution for you. Just let your new pet have some alone time with the little, furry, annoyance and within minutes there will be no trace of it left. Flying Purple People Eaters are also great for getting rid of irritating relatives. Although they do not randomly eat people, these pets can be trained to eat a person on command. Just think of how much peace and quiet there will be at family gatherings when all the aggravating relatives are gone.
Flying Purple People Eaters may be alien creatures, but they are wonderful assets to any family. They can keep your children out from under your feet for hours by playing with them. Owning a Flying Purple People Eater will ensure that you no longer have to put up with a yappy dog. These unusual pets will also bring harmony to your house by getting rid of any relative that annoys you. Deciding to get one of these purple creatures for your family will be one of the best decisions you ever made.
I really enjoy my job, and it certainly pushes me to think creatively. I also enjoy the research I have to do for the articles. I have even more random bits of information in my brain now. Just think, the next time you are looking at information about tapeworms in humans, you could be reading something I wrote!