Category Archives: College

I Got A Gold Star! – Tales of a Psychology Student

Posted on by
1

Currently, I am in my second semester of college, and I am taking my first psychology class. The name of the class is Interpersonal Effectiveness. So far, even though the work is challenging, I am really enjoying this class. Every week I am given at least one discussion topic with specific instructions to follow. My responsibility is to follow those instructions and post a response to the class discussion boards. In addition, One class requirement I must follow is to respond to at least two other student’s assignments. This week’s discussion topic was about sympathy and empathy. The following is the instructions I had to follow:

Conduct an online search for three different definitions of empathy and three different definitions of sympathy. Note: use reputable sources such as Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary and avoid sources such a Wikipedia.

Using your three definitions as sources of support, define the difference(s) between empathy and sympathy and justify your position.

What is the role of empathy in listening and perspective taking? Why would “imagination, open-mindedness, and commitment” be useful skills for being an empathetic listener?

Remember to make references and integrate examples, terms, theory, and research from your readings to support your points and examples.

I am very proud of the response my instructor gave me regarding this assignment, so I thought I would share it with you; including the psychology instructor’s response to my assignment.

Psychology Class Assignment

The online Merriam-Webster Learning Dictionary defines sympathy as:

the feeling that you care about and are sorry about someone else’s trouble, grief, misfortune, etc. : a sympathetic feeling Merriam-Webster Learning Dictionary Retrieved September 21, 2011 from http://www.learnersdictionary.com/search/sympathy

The online Merriam-Webster Learning Dictionary defines empathy as:

the feeling that you understand and share another person’s experiences and emotions Merriam-Webster Learning Dictionary Retrieved September 21, 2011 from http://www.learnersdictionary.com/search/empathy

Although sympathy and empathy sound very familiar, and both are used in reference to feelings, each one has a very distinct and different meaning. In short, sympathy is the acknowledgment of a person’s emotions, and empathy is knowing, understanding, and sharing in a person’s emotions. When used properly, each one can be a valuable tool in a person’s emotional toolbox.

It appears to me that sympathy is about an individual acknowledging another person’s physical and/or emotional pain without actually relating to it. Maybe the individual cannot relate to another’s physical and/or emotional pain because he or she has never experienced a similar set of circumstances, or he or she has no emotional investment in the individual who is experiencing the physical and/or emotional pain. I do think there are times when a person chooses sympathy over empathy in order to maintain some sort of emotional distance.

In my opinion, empathy has to do with an individual’s ability to truly know, understand, and share in another person’s emotions regarding physical and/or emotional pain, as well as in his or her triumphs, joys, and positive circumstances. I think, to some extent, empathy is an acquired skill rather than something that an individual is born with. I believe that in some cases empathy comes with life experience. In other words, for most people, it is very difficult to truly know, understand, and share in another person’s circumstances, positive and/or negative, unless an individual has experienced something similar. Because empathy requires an individual to experience the same sort of emotions that another person is experiencing, it is vital for an individual to maintain some degree of balance in order to protect his or her own emotional health.

While sympathy does acknowledge a person’s emotional pain, physical pain and his or her circumstances, the reality is that it does not require the same type of emotional investment that empathy does. In essence, it is a way for an individual to let another person know that they are thinking about him or her during his or her difficult time. Conversely, empathy is impossible to achieve without an emotional investment. It is a way for an individual to express to another that he or she “has been there, done that, and has the T-shirt to prove it” and that the other person is not alone in his or her pain and joy. In addition, I believe that empathy can act as some sort of catalyst or motivation that very often propels an individual into taking some sort of action. For example, someone who has experienced the loss of a spouse will know what another person, who recently lost a spouse, might be thinking and feeling. The individual will most likely understand and know what things might be causing the other person anxiety, sadness, and how difficult his or her days might be. This understanding and knowledge could propel the individual to prepare a list, for the other person, of things that should be taken care of now that his or her spouse is deceased. It could also motivate an individual to call and check on the other person, or stop by and make sure he or she is okay.

Obviously, there is no way a single individual can have enough life experiences to be able to empathize with every circumstance that another person might have. That is when having the ability to use one’s imagination, being open-minded, and making a commitment to listen to others objectively would come in handy. These three things will allow an individual to see a set of circumstances from another person’s perspective, form an unbiased opinion, and helps an individual feel as if he or she is being listened to without being judged.

“And while perspective taking is not the same as agreeing with the other person, it is a method for taking on another person’s point of view. This requires a suspension of judgment so that for the moment you set aside your own opinions and take on those of the other person.” (Alberts, Jess K.. Interpersonal Effectiveness: Psychology 180. Argosy University, 2009. pp. 80 – 81).

 

Psychology Instructor’s Response

GOLD STAR, Melissa! I may have to save this response and use it in future classes 😉 I really like your summary statement, ” In short, sympathy is the acknowledgment of a person’s emotions, and empathy is knowing, understanding, and sharing in a person’s emotions.” The investment in sympathy can be quite low… the same can’t be said for true empathy!

Keep up the hard work!

Psychology Professor

It’s Finished!

Posted on by
Reply

It’s over! It’s done! IT’S FINISHED!

I am talking about my first semester of college.

Friday night I had to take two finals. One was in English/grammar review, and the other was in math review. I did well. I did really, really well. My score for the English/grammar final was 98%, and my score for the math final was 97%.

I was nervous about taking the math final. I had a lot riding on it. Even though my grade in the class was in A, if I did not do well on the final I technically would not have passed the class. So I studied, and I studied, and then I studied some more. When it came time to take the final it was still nervous; however, I managed to get through the test without having to struggle. It took me about 40 min. to complete the 30 problems on it. I was able to see my score soon as I finished. I cannot tell you how relieved and excited I was to see that I only missed one problem.

After I finished the math final, it was time for me to take the English/grammar final. There was one section that I was slightly nervous about. It had to do with identifying simple, compound, complex, and compound-complex sentences. Even though I could tell you what those types of sentences were, I struggled to identify them in the lessons. In the end, I decided that I probably knew as much is I could absorb when it came to the English/grammar class, so I decided to go ahead and take the final. Out of 55 questions I only missed one, and I scored 100% on the section that I thought I would have problems with.

I am really proud of the final grades I ended up with in each class:

English/grammar review – 98.15%

Math review – 96.56%

Those grades combined with the 100% I made in the Skills for Success class that I had to take in the first session of the semester mean that so far my GPA is excellent.

One of the things that surprised me about the math class is that I found myself actually looking forward to the discussion math questions every week. I enjoyed figuring out the answer to the equations given in formulating a response. I think maybe I am better at math than I ever gave myself credit for. Certainly, I am not proficient at it, nor is it my favorite subject; however, I think my own negative attitude about it probably got in the way of me being able to do well in past math classes.

I think there is a lesson in that revelation. It makes me wonder how many other times my past negative attitude got in the way of me being able to be successful. I think it is a lesson I need to pay attention to.

Busy, Busy, Busy

Posted on by
4

I have had a very busy week. This session of the school semester is winding down, and I had a couple of big projects due. I worked a lot at my writing job. I had an appointment with my counselor, group, and an appointment with my psychiatrist. I went to the diabetes clinic – part of the free clinic I go to – on Thursday. Also, I have not been feeling well.

The class that I had to take for my first session of the Summer semester was something called “Skills for Success”. It has turned out to be something completely different than I thought it was going to be. I had to assess my learning style, figure out if I had external or internal locus of control, determine if I was a lifelong learner (and figure out what I needed to do to become one), and develop critical thinking skills. I have learned a lot about myself from the class assignments.

Because the time zone for the class is different than mine, I have until 2 in the morning my time to turn assignments in. I have never been late or even pushed that deadline, until Tuesday. I had not felt well all day, and when I sat down to do an assignment I fell asleep. I woke up about an hour or so before the deadline had passed. Unfortunately, my head must have been on the “W”. When I woke up, the screen was full of “W’s” and all the work I had done was gone. I took a screen shot…

I retyped everything, and it looked like I was going to make the deadline, and then…I fell asleep again! I did finally get the assignment turned in, about an hour late. The instructor could have deducted points from it since it was late. That is school policy. However, he chose not to.

Things went really well at the mental health center. I have qualified for another six month of services, and the psychiatrist is pleased with how I am doing. I do not have to see her again until the end of September. She did ask me to bring her some pictures from Alaska.

For the last few weeks my feet have been swelling…

For the last few days, I have felt totally exhausted, no matter how much sleep I get. When I went to the diabetes clinic I mentioned it the doctor. He did a routine test, and told me that I have kidney damage. He said that would explain the swelling, and could be why I have been feeling so run down. However, he has order some tests for my kidneys, as well as a thyroid test. I have had several thyroid tests over the last few years, it is common when you have a mental health issue, so my gut tells me that is not the problem, but I could be wrong.

This is how the doctor at the free clinic wrote the prescription for my depression medication…

Look at Me Now

Posted on by
2

To date, my college experience has been awesome. The staff and faculty are extremely kind and helpful, and I continue to make good grades. I am getting to know the other students, and I’m learning how to be better organized. The assignments I have had so far have really pushed me to look at myself in a different way. I think my favorite assignment so far was the one where I had to decide if I was a lifelong learner or not and what things I needed to do to become a lifelong learner.

The other day, while doing some research for assignment I discovered something. I could get a student ID! Apparently, the college does not routinely send out student IDs to the online students, however, a student can request one. So I did. It has arrived in the mail. Yay!

I am looking forward to taking my student ID and getting a student discount somewhere.

 

Third Week Of College

Posted on by
1

This week I started my third week of college. It has been a challenging experience so far. I have also encountered a few things that have taken me by surprise. However, I think given how long it has been since I have been in any academic environment, I am doing okay.

Learning online has been more difficult different. It certainly does require me to be more self-motivated than I naturally tend to be. Keeping to a schedule – due dates – other than my own has caused me some frustration. I find myself getting bogged down in the details – wanting things to be perfect – which is slowing me down some.

One of the things that makes Argosy different from my experience with brick and mortar colleges is how they arrange their class schedule. They do follow a semester schedule, and each semester is 15 weeks long. However, they break each 15 week semester into two 7.5 week sessions. You are considered a full-time student if you take two classes per each session. Basically that means you would end up with a total of four classes per semester. Each 7.5 week class gives you the same amount of information, and work as a full semester class would, which means you have to assimilate a whole semester’s worth of information in about half the time. Obviously, this is why my school workload is a little heavier than most, even though I am currently only taking one class. This also means, that potentially you could earn your four year degree in less than four years.

Currently, I am on what they call a three-quarter schedule. What that means is for this session of the semester I am only taking one class, however, when the second session of the semester starts I will be taking two classes. For the following semester, I could keep the same three-quarter schedule or change it to a full-time schedule. As of now, I have not made a decision on whether or not I am going to go full time next semester. I am going to hold off on doing that until after the second session starts and I see how I do with taking two classes in a short amount of time.

The class I am taking for this session is called Skills for Success. I can see why this is a required class for every new student in the school. First of all, it gives you a real good idea of what it is like to have to learn a subject in half the normal time. The other thing it does, is emphasize how important it is to keep some sort of schedule. With the fast pace of the courses it is vital for students to be aware of all their due dates. This class also prepares the students for college-level writing. The ultimate goal final project of this class is to take everything you have learned through the class assignments and create a learning plan for yourself.

One of the things I had to do in the first week of this class was take some diagnostic tests that were meant to assess my grammar skills. Since I spend a lot of time writing I assumed the diagnostic tests would present no problem for me. I was extremely surprised at my results:

  • Sentence Grammar        67%
  • Punctuation and Mechanics    83%
  • Usage and Style        87%
  • Basic Grammar        92%

I was very humbled. I consider that a good thing. I think if I had kept on with my attitude of “I know it already” I would have missed out on some great learning experiences, and most likely set myself up for failure – since I would not be as open to learning as I should have been.

Fortunately, the school does not just leave you with those results with no opportunity to learn what you need to in order to improve them. In addition to the coursework that is required, there is a whole bunch of videos and grammar exercises that I am required to do to bring my grammar scores up to par.

I think one of the things that has impressed me the most about the college I have chosen to go to is their desire to see their students succeed. They do not just throw you in the deep end, hoping that you will figure out how to swim. They give you plenty of opportunities, and help to ensure that your college career is as successful as you would like to make it.

I Got Great News!

Posted on by
Reply

I received some wonderful news yesterday evening! I was told that my college tuition would be hundred percent paid for by federal financial aid. I knew that part of my tuition would be paid for that way, but I was totally surprised that all of it would be. The funny thing is I had become so frustrated with the whole process of obtaining financial aid that I was on the verge of just giving up.

Last week, I submitted the FASFA – the application for financial aid. After I submitted it I was told I was going to have to provide more paperwork because I had been picked for a process called verification. All that really means is the review people wanted me to provide some kind of proof to back up the things I said on the FASFA. I managed to get that paperwork turned in before Friday’s deadline. Unfortunately, there was a mistake on the verification worksheet – I ended up having to submit it a total of three times yesterday.

Since it was late Friday afternoon before all of my paperwork could be submitted for the review process, I figured that no one would look at it until at least Monday or Tuesday. Instead, the nice young lady I have been working with made sure someone reviewed my paperwork yesterday evening. As soon as they finished looking over everything, and made a decision about my financial aid, I was notified.

The review people came to the conclusion that I had no financial resources with which to use toward my tuition. They based their decision on a document – my Statement of Earnings from the Georgia Department of Labor -that indicated I had no income for the years 2009, 2010, and 2011. Since Jo Bob and I are separated they felt like his income was not a part of my household, and chose not to take it into consideration when reviewing my application.

The financial aid aspect of college was my biggest worry. If I have been told that I was going to have to pay any portion of the tuition, I had no idea how I was going to get the money. I think knowing that my college tuition is taken care of in full will allow me to get more out of the college experience than I would have.

The only thing about this whole process that bothers me is that I can’t share the news with dad. I did cry about that last night.