Once again, I have been told I am N O R M A L – normal. It seems it is perfectly normal to be this upset under the same – or similar – circumstances I find myself in. My gears were not slipping, I am not experiencing depression symptoms, and I am not in danger of having a breakdown…at this time. I am simply grieving.

Okay yes, I know there are several of you who have said the exact same thing to me already. I apologize for not believing you, but as you may have noticed, I am rather hard headed and sometimes I need an “expert” to convince me of something.

The psychiatrist did increase my dose of anxiety medication – doubling it. Usually, I only take buspar – anxiety medication – as needed, even though I can take 10 milligrams up to 3 times a day. I have been using it more since dad died, but still not taking it 3 times a day. The psychiatrist now wants me to take 20 milligrams 3 times a day – every day not just as needed – for the next few weeks. She also wants me to come back at the end of April, and not wait until an already scheduled appointment in May.

Basically, after she told me I was normal, she did say we did need to watch things a little more closely than usual – because of the higher chance of developing a depressive episode. She said if I am still feeling such extreme emotions in a few weeks then we might be look8ing at a depressive episode – triggered by dad’s death. However, she really seemed to think that I would be feeling some better by then.

What a relief!