I love my personal space. It is something I treasure and cherish and enjoy. I do think I enjoy it a lot more than is probably healthy for me, so I have been taking steps to find a balance.

In a hospital there is no such thing as personal space. It cannot exist and have all those people do what they need to do to you. Knowing that I was sick and the only way I would be able to get out of the hospital was to cooperate, I just let the hospital staff do what they needed to do and did not worry about my personal space.

For the first couple of days out of the hospital I gave no thought to my personal space. I was too tired. Plus, people were really good about just leaving me alone unless I needed something.

After my mother left to go back to her home my daughter has not left my side. She is being a personal space invader. Seriously, it is as if she is glued there. It is making me feel rather…cranky, irritable, anxious, and closed in. Those feelings are making me feel incredibly guilty.

I know there are moms out there who would give anything to have a child wanting to be that close to them that much. There are moms out there who would not see it as a personal space invasion. They would feel very grateful and blessed if they were in my situation. Yet, all I can think of is how can I nicely redirect my daughter so I can have even a few minutes of her not invading my personal space.

In addition to feeling guilty about the negative feelings I am having right now about her invading my personal space, I feel very selfish. The kid had not seen me much while I was in the hospital, due to the distance. She missed me, and here I am in my head, WHINING about her wanting to be that physically close to me. Yet, it still feels like a personal space invasion to me.

The closed in feeling is the worst. It is if there is not enough room around me to breath. It is not physically not being able to breath, like from an asthma attack, it is purely mental. However, the feeling itself does make it seem real.

I love her and I do not want to hurt her feelings, but I need to figure out a good compromise so that she feels close to me and I can have some personal space to recharge my mental batteries.

Have a great day Neighbors!