As I mentioned in Honoring Our Parents Is Good For Us and in Honoring Our Parents – Just Do It, honoring our parents is good for us, and we should start doing immediately. I am fully aware that for some of us this is very difficult to do. However, I can tell you that it can be done.
Honoring our parents does not mean we have to grovel, kiss butt, or seek their approval. It is about forgiving them, and having whatever relationship we can have them. It will require that we sacrifice some of our time, either to visit them, call them, or even send them the occasional email or card.
Honoring Our Parents – Give Them A Tribute
When I was listening to James McDonald the other day, he spoke about writing a tribute to our parents. As I listened to him talk about it, and describe what could be put in it, I was inspired to write a tribute to my mother. It was very special for me to write, and watch her face as she read it. It made me feel good to honor her, and know that she was touched by what I wrote.
Writing a tribute to our parents, is a good way to express appreciation for the sacrifices they made for us, and acknowledge any good they did. It is also a great way to tell them that we love them. It is something we can do to honor our parents, no matter how bad our relationships with them are.
Honoring Our Parents – Writing The Tribute
There are a few things we should keep in mind when we write our tributes:
1. Write a tribute to each parent. Do not the tributes into one document.
2. Be honest. Do not fill it full of a bunch flattery, and mushy stuff you do not feel. No one has perfect parents so do not pretend that yours are.
3. Be positive. Focus only on the good. Philippians 4:8 says,
“Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable . . . think about these things.”
Focus on the good. If you are having a difficult time thinking of something positive about your parents, pray. God will give you the wisdom to see what you need.
4. Be public. Read your tributes, or at the very least give it to your parents, in front of your children, and your spouse. You will be modeling behavior that will be passed on for many generations.
5. THE TIME IS NOW! Don’t put it off, write your tributes immediately.
If you have a parent/parents that you do not see – for whatever reason – go ahead and write a tribute to them. It will help you release the anger and bitterness you might be feeling for them. Then pray that God gives you a chance to share what your wrote with them.
Honoring out parents is good for us. It helps us heal and to release any anger or bitterness we may be feeling towards them. If we have a good relationship with our parents, a tribute is a way of honoring and them and letting them know how much we appreciate them. Excuses for not doing it are not allowed. Just do it!
When I was researching this topic, I found a great website with a guide for writing a tribute. It is A Step by Step Guide to Writing a Tribute
Previous posts about honoring our parents are Honoring Our Parents Is Good For Us and Honoring Our Parents – Just Do It
Great idea. Not hard at all to do for my mom/step dad.
I find it hard to think about doing this and being positive all in one when it comes to my birth father. And therefore, don’t see it is something I can do and continue to be positive.
Well one thing you could do is try to write down any positive things you can think of about your birth father. Maybe you could get your mom or someone to help. Then write it, but hold onto it. If nothing else, writing down some good things about him might help you think about him in a slightly more positive way.
I’m pretty sure my mom wouldn’t have anything positive. She’s told me many times the only thing he was good for was donating sperm. :oP
I’ve thought about your post all evening. As an earlier massage and then therapy appt brought up some of the negative about him.
I’m off to bed. Where I hope to not remember anything about him. Since today has been one of those trigger filled nothing positibve days. I get the need to think and be positive….oh do I ever. Just not coming so easy today.
It is not always easy. It has taken me a very long time to even get where I am in positive thinking. Some days are still pretty darn hard. However, I can see how changing my mindset has been very beneficial to my overall mental health. Just keep trying, the bad days will come less frequently.
This is a great idea and I think I need to do it. Just need to get up the courage (-: Thanks Melissa.
I am so glad you found this helpful. You can do it! Just think about how good it will make them feel.