Managing Not Dealing

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Something was pointed out to me today. When I heard this I did a mental double take. Then I realized the truth in the statement.

Managing our issues is so much better than just dealing with them.

Dealing with them implies that in some way an issue has defeated us or is in control. Managing implies that we are not letting an issue be in control. One word discounts our efforts in resolving an issue, the other acknowledges our efforts and allows for us to keep trying.

I think this is a very important statement for anyone. Mental illness or not, we all have issues. We all want some sort of resolution to our issues. Often when no resolution is obtained, we become frustrated. We develop a defeatist attitude and often just decide to “deal” with it. Dealing with it, in my opinion, means that we have come to accept the issue, and its control over us, without putting anymore effort into resolving it. When we have reached a sort of acceptance of an issue and its control of us, and decide to just “deal” with it, we often view ourselves and our efforts in resolution as failures.

I think managing an issue allows us to see it from a more positive perspective. Even in our lack of resolution, managing our issues keeps them from controlling us. We do not see a lack of resolution as failure. We see it as an opportunity to try again. We can look at our previous efforts and acknowledge that even efforts that did not bring about resolution are valuable. Every effort to bring about resolution will effect some sort of change.

I am sure that some people could argue that this is just a question of semantics. Manage and deal have similar definitions. However similar is not the same. When I looked at the definitions for both of the words, manage had more success oriented words than deal had. The definition for manage had words like direct, control, and to succeed. The definition for deal had words like to take action, and to behave in a certain way.

Do you think that changing just one word, deal to manage, really makes a difference in our efforts to resolve issues and maintain a positive attitude? Or do you think that both words are similar enough that it does not make a difference?

Are there instances you can think of where changing just one word in how you thought or spoke about something changed your whole perspective in how you viewed the issue or situation?

Food for thought, Neighbors!

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18 thoughts on “Managing Not Dealing”

Does the difference between ‘want’ and ‘need’ count? I’m constantly having that discussion with my son…. He ‘wants’ the remote control car, he doesn’t ‘need’ the remote control car….
.-= ASBLACKASOBAMA´s last blog ..The World Is Supposed To End Anyway =-.

18 thoughts on “Managing Not Dealing”

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